Anniversaries are one of the most important days of life. This day reminds us of a beautiful day in our lives when we were in a strong and loving relationship. We have collected some Funny Anniversary Poems which will further strengthen the love and create humor between husband and wife. Let’s read
Table of Contents
Funny Anniversary Poems For Him / Husband
Thirty-four years we’ve been married,
and our life together has been varied.
But our love just keeps growing,
so this I am knowing,
we’ll be together until we’re buried!
Now if that’s not okay with you, dear,
let me make myself perfectly clear:
you are stuck with me like glue,
and there’s nothing you can do.
So take that and stick it in your ear!
– Kim Merryman
McGee Pleads The 50th
The boys were sitting all around the table with McGee
As he took to task to pour the glass of every man he’d see
“It’s my anniversary” he would boast and say it loud
“50 years of married bliss” He shouted to the crowd
Remembering his first one he lean toward good Ole’ Finn
“A trip to Hawaii, was the gift I gave her then”
Finn said “After 50 years what gift could she now lack ?”
McGee just smiled and softy said,” I think I’ll bring her back”
– Jerry T Curtis
Sitting On The Swing
laughing a joyous laugh
a giggle escapes my mouth’s path
swinging on this swing i do
another swing here by you
with the sky as dark as my mother’s hair
playing here then playing there
with one small swing takes another flight
im here with you on this wonderful night
– Faire Lucas
I splashed out on this greetings card,
It cost me 50p,
I thought that you were worth it,
For putting up with me.
But yours, I know, will cost far more,
(Perhaps a quid or two),
But that’s because I’m worth far more,
For putting up with you.
– John Coopey
You almost had me,
I wanted you,
The way you stuck to me like super glue,
I was feeling you,
But I knew,
I could never have you,
But, the way you looked at me,
The way my body pleads,
We can never be,
Because I’m too old,
And your only thirteen.
– Anthony Scandrick II
If I Could Back In Time
If I could go back in time today,
Way before we met,
I’d search and find you right way,
To form our loving duet.
Far, far back, I’d go for you,
To marry you much sooner;
We’d tie the knot, and you would be,
My amorous honeymooner.
I love our anniversary now;
I’m Happier every year;
I just wish there’d been more time,
For me to love you, Dear!
– Joanna Fuchs
My parents’ repeated refrain –
“Money doesn’t grow on trees.”
In my dreams, a lush tree grew
with leaves of high numbers,
nothing under a twenty.
On our 25th Anniversary,
our church threw
a surprise party.
After the pot-luck dinner,
a gaily wrapped gift box
sported a top slit, waving
a bit of green. As we pulled,
a chain of bills roped up
through the slot, coiling
ribbons of green.
I had seen “Money Trees”
as special occasion gifts,
but for the one and only
time, we experienced the gift
of “Money in a Box.”
– Cona Adams
12 Days Of Kiss-Mas
On the 12th day of kiss-mass my true love sent to me
12 dirty undies
11 socks a stinking
10 shoes a humming
9 shirts for pressing
7 days of take-out boxes
6 flagons of beer
5 D V D’s
4 mischievous children
3 dozen wine bottles
2 ex partners
and an engagement ring under the tree
– Anna-Marie Docherty
Red Cheeks. ( Both Sets.)
After tossing back too many shots,
My tummy got tied up in knots.
But the outhouse fell down,
now a king with no crown,
I cover up where I must: “Thank You Scotts’!”
– Gerard Keogh Jr.
Put on a new dress, was looking really hot,
Dyed my hair with several blonde highlights,
Applied my MAC makeup… ooh-la-la,
I’m singing Al Greene, “So In Love With You”
Its our wedding anniversary, 29th and you knew
Bubbles overflow from the champagne bottle
You beckon me to come hither into our room
Which shoes to wear… oh you burst my bubble!
– Lee Ramage
Squeaky Clean Floors of Teak
Squeaky Clean Floors of Teak
All clean and shiny is my teak
When they step on my
Glossy black my heart leaps
Joyous smiles deep down my timbers leak
You can see your face and physique
When you look at me
Don’t walk on me with your dirty feet
Shhh….. Whisper when you speak
If you’re real quiet you’ll hear me squeak.
Funny Anniversary Poems For Her / Wife
Diluted to Polluted
Christmas Day will never be the same
Whilst companies who will only think gain
It’s charms now diluted
Frankly, the fat cats are solely to blame
– James Fraser
I saw a little button,
It was lying on the floor,
I wondered who had lost it
And looked around for more.
It hadn’t come from Donna
Or from Stuart’s nice new shirt,
And it wasn’t Kelly’s button
That was lying in the dirt.
I couldn’t find who lost it
I had a worried frown.
But now I know the answer,
My trousers just fell down.
– May Fenn
No valentine on Valentine’s.
I haven’t met one yet.
Each year I wait another
for a person I’ve not met.
There’s nothing I’ve done wrong:
yet waiting is in vain.
And all that’s left is hope
that love’s a ball and chain.
– Trevor McLeod
Oo La Ween!
Welcome to my naughty Halloween
Meet my dark and beautiful dream
On this night she’s a witch
But by day not a stitch
So she’s a stripper, but she’s still my Queen
– James Fraser
I Love You
Often, I have uttered these words to myself
Your feminity has entranced my manhood
My vision is focused on your subject matter
A quick study of a woman’s psychology
I feel you with my mind, and touch you with my eyes
Senses are heightened in your very presence
Soon, I will utter the ultimate words of encouragement
Constant admiration for your hidden strengths
Instant chemistry between us has changed our biology
Soon, I will hold you tight and recite the following;
Baby, I love you
– Jaquay Atkins
On this date I had my first spanking in the days of yore,
The first of many I received not realizing what for.
This one was very special causing a unique frown ,
because this time they turned me upside down.
Well that should have given me a clue,
That they weren’t about to be through.
There I was hanging by my feet,
Hungry wet and naked..
looking for something to eat..
Some dude cut a rope off my gut,
then had the nerve to spank my butt.
Yes, the first time I was spanked and didn’t know what I did..
Well that was a fine howdy do…. Welcome to earth kid!
– Robert A. Dufresne
Funny Anniversary Quotes for Husband Wife
Most modern calendars mar the sweet simplicity of our lives by reminding us that each day that passes is the anniversary of some perfectly uninteresting event. – Oscar Wilde
Marriage is the perfection of what love aimed at, ignorant of what it sought. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Our wedding was many years ago. The celebration continues to this day. – Gene Perret
- There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage. – Martin Luther
- The highest happiness on earth is marriage. – William Lyon Phelps
- A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance, and tenacity. The order varies for any given year. – Paul Sweeney
- As we grow old, the beauty steals inward. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
- Marriage is like a dollar bill. You cannot spend half of it when you tear it in two. The value of one half depends upon the other. – Joe Moore
- A good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the individuals and in the way they express their love. – Pearl Buck
- Marriage: a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters written in prose. – Beverly Nichols
- The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret. – Henry Youngman
A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong. – Milton Berle
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